Monday, February 23, 2009

Being a 'Preacher Girl'

Preface: Growing up as a pastor's daughter, then going to a small baptist college, and then heading off to Truett I have spent a great deal of time around 'preacher boys'. A habit of preacher boys that tends to drive me crazy is how at almost any point in time they slip into conversations about the church- this would not be so obnoxious if they were not so cliquey about it. They tend to isolate the women around them and assume we have nothing to offer to the conversation.
(end preface)

A small group of us headed to grab a drink after worship tonight. As we sat around the table we chatted about work and ministry and all that. Then it happened: I became a 'preacher boy'!!! My friend Joe and I just jumped into it. We talked abut the state of the church, the future of ministry, the future of our ministries, how being a pastor has the potential of effecting our relationships, and on and on. My friend next to me moved over to another seat so that she could chat with the other people at the table, as we chatted away. He asked my opinion (and I gave some unsolicited thoughts as well), I was respected and valued the same as anyone else in the profession. I was a preacher girl- and although I do feel slightly bad that my other friends left the chat- it felt so good to be respected. It felt great to jump in and talk about my passion. It is good to be a preacher girl.
Thanks Joe.

Sunday, February 22, 2009

The Tension in Worship

There is something profoundly beautiful about the honest worship songs we have been singing this weekend. These songs were written by the worship leaders that are here and they sing of pain and the healing. They admit that we have been broken before and we know we will be broken again, still follow.

On my flight to Convergence I was reading Walter Brueggemann's Spirituality of the Psalms. As I read about the psalms of orientation, disorientation, and new orientation my heart resonated with that understanding of God and of how we praise our Creator. At one point in time my faith was naive, then it was shattered, and it was re-created. The new faith has at times been just as naive as the first faith- it has be reoriented. Still, my faith is often more cautious than it was before. It is tender. I have experienced that cycle more than once. In fact I feel that I am probably in a place of disorientation even now.

The worship here has echoed that understanding of the flow of life. We have sung songs of both grief and rejoicing. The sound of distinctively female voices rising up in confession to the Lord has be therapeutic for my soul. God is here- wooing us. Reminding us that we are created in the image of God as a precious creation. Also reminding us that we must surrender to God's goodness, we must choose to allow God's redemption. I love the tension of those two realities. The freedom to cry out in earnest to my Abba, along side the understanding that God is already aware and already healing me.

I hope to post some of the lyrics here, but first I have to get permission. Their honesty is refreshing, and healing.

Saturday, February 21, 2009

Fragile Strength

Fragile strength.
Held together by the cut and torn pieces of fabric.
Bent and broken branches, creating a nest.

These baskets were the center pieces on each of our tables at Convergence.
They represent our lives.
Our beautiful mess.
Trusted by God to hold precious pieces of life.

We are women who lead In The Way of Jesus.

We sat together and shared our stories.
We had 15 minutes each to share and in that time we were listened to.
For 15 minutes 4 women sat and heard me- with out judgment, without advice, with love.
They listened with love and understanding.
They have been hurt and are healing.
We know each others pain without having to speak it, but we have the freedom to speak it here.

We are that nest- we are the broken and bending pieces that create the whole.
The whole that is fragile strength: malleable enough to be used by God, strong enough to hold the church, to guide her and move her toward The Way.

Friday, February 20, 2009

Other people's prayers

In recent years I have begun to love written prayers.

I have a little gift shop book of prayers diverse backgrounds and I enjoy it immensely.

Here are two little ones that I love:

I want to want to want to want you God. ~Michael Ramsey

You, whose day it is, make it beautiful. Get out your rainbow colors, so it will be beautiful. ~Nootka Song

As for the first, mt heart echoes the dream of desiring God more.
And the second reminds me that this day- every day- belongs to My Creator.

I'd love it if you shared some of your favorite prayers with me- one liners like these or long monologues- all are welcome!

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

This weekend I will be spending 3 days with 4 lovely ladies from Seven at this fabulous event.

I am excited!!

Sunday, February 15, 2009

untitled poem

Hope blessed beautiful hope
No more anger
No more fear
Stop dwelling- be here
Be awakened
Be aware
Change the future
Change the past
Grab hold of only those things that last
Beauty full of truth
Directness- honest love
No more lies
No more hiding
Grabbing hold of something
Finding peace
Finding grace
Giving more than you take
Seeing people
Seeing truth
Helping others- helping you
Knowing wisdom
Loving fully
Thinking clearly
Letting go
Living in freedom
Watching people grow
Changing the world
Acting simply
Living in love
Hoping for something true
Loving others- loving you
Dancing with excitement
Living each moment
Embracing truth

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Because I pretty much love my life and want you to enjoy it with me!

This is the beautiful flier created by my fabulous friend Rachel.

Just in case the image is too small for fragile eyes-
The show is:
Friday 7-10
455 Dolores St @18th

It is going to be RAD!

Monday, February 9, 2009

Chocolate with a Heart

This chocolate is a gift from the cocoa gods (or proof that God really does love us)!! Divine chocolate is some of the best chocolate I have ever partaken of and I have enjoyed an abundance of chocolate. As a farmer-owned fair trade company they are not only producing amazing chocolate they are providing sustainable economic growth. I seriously love, love, love this chocolate.

Fair Trade chocolate tastes better in general- it is usually higher quality, and it doesn't reek of child labor and slavery.

Just in case you haven't crossed over into the world of fair or ethically traded only chocolate here is an excerpt from an article I was checking out:

"Today about 70% of the world's chocolate comes from West Africa, while the remaining bit is harvested in Central/South America and Asia. About 40% of the world's cocoa comes from the small West African country Ivory Coast where in 2002 it was discovered that 284,000 children were trapped in bonded labor on cocoa farms. 15,000 of those children have been trafficked from surrounding countries, the majority of which are Mali, Benin, Togo and Burkina Faso. Ghana, Nigeria and Cameroon, West Africa's other cocoa producers are also known to receive and provide trafficked children." (

The article goes on to discuss the multitudes that rely on the cocoa industry and how much we as American's consume. It is pretty interesting. The site has some helpful links to understanding the problem in multiple industries.

Happy Chocolate shopping!

Sunday, February 8, 2009

red lipstick

The tiny red tube of paint intimidated her the when she saw it in the store.
She thought instead to buy the berry or whine tone- they were less dramatic.
Still, the goal was to be dramatic.
With some insecurity she bought it.
She set out on her mission:
30 days of red lipstick
30 days of knowing that the words she allowed to escape her mouth would require an elegant force in order to compete with the lips they were passing through
30 days of believing that she was worthy of her own luxurious full red lips
30 days of audaciousness

January was red lipstick month and these were the lessons learned:
Red lipstick is like a secret you tell the world without ever saying a word.
Red lips are not bashful; they refuse to hide.
They are an invitation to allow the world to see you and know that you are here; you matter; you are passion; you are truth; you are beauty; you are a creation of the Master Artist.

Even wisdom literature knows that red lips are significant.

You're so beautiful, my darling, so beautiful, and your dove eyes are veiled by your hair as it flows and shimmers, like a flock of goats in the distance streaming down a hillside in the sunshine. Your smile is generous and full— expressive and strong and clean. Your lips are jewel red, your mouth elegant and inviting, your veiled cheeks soft and radiant. The smooth, lithe lines of your neck command notice—all heads turn in awe and admiration! Your breasts are like fawns, twins of a gazelle, grazing among the first spring flowers.
Song of Songs 4:1

Friday, February 6, 2009

introducing Mrs. Nonpareil

She is proper, and perfect. She sits on the front pew quiet as a church mouse all through her husbands well crafted sermon. She is the PTA secretary (being president would be too flamboyant). She married the her husband immediately after graduation and their life is pure bliss. She votes Republican. Dinner is served at 5 and she wears heals and pearls while she cooks and cleans (a lady must present herself well at all times).She has never done anything daring. She has impeccable etiquette. There is nothing remarkable about her, she is busy, and needs no attention for herself. She is convinced that a proverbs 31 woman is far too scandalous a lifestyle to pursue.
She is the woman my stubborn spirit refuses to be; while I secretly envy her.

Monday, February 2, 2009

What if Jesus came to live for us more than he came to die for us?

Sunday, February 1, 2009

coffee is a joy

so for my creativity class we took 5 photos of things that bring us joy- here is one of my faves
I love the idea of recording the little things that thrill your soul and the details of how life really is a blessing
the coffee was purchased and shared with me by my fabulous friend Pryor (great name) at Coffee to the People in the Haight.
love the french press

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