Sunday, March 15, 2009

too obvious

When I went home to Texas in December I almost stayed- well not exactly, but I was dreaming of how I was going to come back to San Francisco for just long enough to say good-bye.

After flying back into my amazing city on the bay in January I felt sure that God was asking me to stay just a bit longer- and I was not comfortable with that.

Who am I here without my role on the ReIMAGINE staff? Who am I as a faith leader not leading in any faith community? Who I am without a title?

Wait!! Did I really just ask those questions??? Did I, a person who has told many people that they are not defined by their accomplishments and titles, really just ask these questions??

The answer was so easy when I was talking to someone else; as they failed a test; as they received rejection letters from jobs and schools; as they were passed over; as they had to reevaluated their identity.

Still, the too obvious answer went unnoticed for much of the past 3 months as I went without a title.

This time last year I chose to go over 40 days without makeup or jewelry, because I needed to know I was not defined by my adornments. It seems this year I am going a yet determined amount of time with out a title, to teach me I am not defined by a job description.

I don't know how long I will have the joy of living in this place. I do however know that at the very least God is teaching me who I am.

1 comment:

Christine said...

Well, I'm so happy that you're staying.
You don't need titles-- 'Friend' is good enough for me ;)

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