Growing up I couldn't stand the girls that carried bridal magazines and had their weddings planed (and by growing up I mean up until last year). Than something crazy happened in my heart and I finally realized that I wanted the hope/anticipation they all had. I wanted the blissful belief in love and marriage, and somehow despite living a thousand failed almost love stories (or at least they have felt like a thousand) somewhere in this past year I found that hope and I have fought for that hope.
It was kind of crazy. It was like out of no where I started to believe that someday it would be me and that nothing was going to prevent it from being me. Months ago I was recounting a tale of love that failed while walking by a store window and seeing beautiful Vera Wang dress. I stopped dead in my tracks. It was so beautiful it took my breath away. My gracious and loving friend looked at me with horror, so afraid I would break down on the side walk and weep. She looked at me and urged me to walk away, my fragile heart didn't need to be put through the longing and pain. I looked at her and said no, the dress was renewing my hope. That story didn't work and maybe not the next one, but I will be loved. I will wear a dress as beautiful as the one in the window (but probably not as expensive).
Now I will admit that was a wonderful moment when I knew the truth. Like most single women I don't always know the truth. I never thought I would be entering my late twenties and single. I also never thought I would be 'needy' enough to wish/hope for something else. Still, I feel like there is a purpose to the heartbreaks I have had and a purpose to the healing I am currently pushing myself through. I am not saying that I am ready, but I am hopeful, oh and I have started reading some really beautiful wedding blogs lately. (You should look at this one: 100 Layer Cake.) Mostly I read them because they are wonderfully GORGEOUS and I enjoy looking at pretty things. I am also inspired by the creative details and decorations and all the fun ways you can make the celebration fabulous and make people feel special. (I sometimes wish I was an event planner, being hospitable is my favorite thing.)
So today after helping host my third baby shower and as I am anticipating a wonderful wedding weekend for my friend Julie I want to share this little video with you that one of my friends recently sent to me. It feels kind of crazy to post someone else' wedding video but it is so freaking adorable.
Jennie sent me the video with a little note that said 'this could be you.' Someday it will.